What is pegging? Flipping the script on pleasure

Pegging is one of those practices that broadens the spectrum of what’s possible in the bedroom. Strictly speaking, the term describes a person with a clitoris anally penetrating a partner who has a penis — usually with the help of a strap-on.

But that’s just the dictionary definition. In reality, shared pleasure belongs to everyone, and this practice can be adapted in countless ways. A label was never going to stand in the way of desire, after all.

A whole new angle on anal pleasure

Anatomy being what it is, a person with a clitoris can’t naturally penetrate a partner — which can feel a little frustrating when curiosity strikes. Who hasn’t wondered what it’s like on the other side? What does that sensation actually feel like?

Pegging offers a partial answer to that delicious existential question. What’s certain is that it shakes up the usual “rules” of intimacy. The familiar pattern — one partner penetrating, the other being penetrated — gets turned on its head, opening the door to new sensations and a different but genuinely intense experience for both people.

When we talk about pleasure for people with a clitoris, the G-spot inevitably comes up. People with a penis have an equivalent: the P-spot. P stands for prostate, and when stimulated — through pegging or otherwise — it can deliver remarkably powerful pleasure. An experience well worth exploring.

And we can be grateful to the toy industry for thinking of everybody: there’s a whole world of equipment out there designed to satisfy this kind of curiosity. 🔥

How to bring pegging into your relationship

Even though sexual taboos are slowly being dismantled, some subjects are still tricky to raise. And while “just talk about it” sounds simple, it’s a bit more delicate than dropping “Darling, I’d like to strap on a harness and penetrate you” between the cheese course and dessert. I’m exaggerating on purpose — the point is that introducing any new practice into a couple’s sex life deserves time and care.

Gauge your partner’s interest first

My first piece of advice: test the waters. Whether your partner has heard of pegging or not, take time to talk it through together. It’s the best way to avoid misunderstandings and make sure your desire is clearly understood by your other half.

Take time to explain and reassure

If your partner feels apprehensive, walk them through how it works — particularly how to avoid any pain, if that’s their worry. Clearing up doubts goes a long way toward making the unknown feel less intimidating.

That said, consent always comes first. If your partner isn’t comfortable with the idea, for whatever reason, put the question on pause. There may be a chance to revisit it down the road — or not, and that’s okay too.

Talk through desires and set boundaries

If, on the other hand, the idea starts to grow on your partner, dig into the details together. What makes you nervous about trying it? What excites you? Which position sounds most appealing for a first time? How will you prepare? Because yes — like any form of anal play, pegging calls for a minimum of preparation.

It’s also wise to set boundaries in advance, and to agree on a safe word: a word that signals your partner should stop immediately, no questions asked.

Start with simple positions

Not sure which positions suit a first attempt? I’d suggest a seated position or doggy style. Both let the person being penetrated control the pace and depth — far more reassuring for beginners, and therefore more enjoyable too.

Gearing up: the right equipment for pegging

Let’s get straight to it: you’re ready to try, but not sure which toy to reach for. No stress — here’s your guide.

Among the many options out there, you might consider:

• A classic strap-on harness with dildo. The go-to choice. Look for an adjustable, comfortable harness and start with a slim, smooth dildo — size can always go up later, never the other way around for a first time.
• A strapless strap-on. Held in place internally, it stimulates the wearer at the same time — pleasure on both sides of the equation.
• A vibrating model. Added sensations for one or both partners, depending on the design.

Whatever you choose, two non-negotiables: a generous amount of water-based lubricant (the anus doesn’t self-lubricate), and patience. Go slowly, communicate constantly, and let pleasure set the pace.

Happy exploring!